Happy Easter With Jesus

Easter is upon us. I think about all tthe things that I have not done. I think about all the things that stand in the way of that relationship with Jesus and me. I think about how much respect do I give Jesus. How much trash is their in that inner place of myself where only I go but a few times. Kind of like what the apostle Paul said in Romanns 7. O wreched man, who will deliver me from this. I know all that, I have heard all the verses, all the advice, but their is something in me that keeps riding the fence. I want the best of both worlds. Thats not the way my Lord had it in the garden of Gethsemane. I wish I could be courageous enough to just move on, to move to a new place, a place where it is fresh and new. Maybe that what Jesus offers me everyday, maybe thats what is being offered to me at the Lords Supper. My best to those who find that intimate place with Jesus this season and maybe you could drop me a line and tell me how you did it.

1 Corinthians 10:21-22 NIRV-ENG

You can't drink the cup of the Lord and the cup of demons too. You can't have a part in both the Lord's table and the table of demons. Are we trying to make the Lord jealous? Are we stronger than he is?

Our new landlord, DJ

Last Thursday DJ invited the Camp Daniel family to his new house to celebrate and dedicate it to God. DJ was blessed to be able to purchase this home, 4 miles from camp.

Marceaux and I are blessed by DJ asking us to move in with him. This has created a mutual dependent relationship between us both. Dj will depend on us for daily needs and we depend on him for a beautiful place to live. We all will depend on each other for relationship and family and the lessons we will teach each other.

Freshness

The new year should bring a fresh start but as my experience has shown me, that is not allways the case. I get chained to some of the prespectives that I had in the old year and my mind just will not open up to the new way of doing things. It should not be like that. What do I have to do? I don't want to go down that road again, the roads that I have choose in the past have been a distaster, is their someone who will give me a better route? I am caught between a rock and a hard place. Jesus offers me this all I have to do is follow!!


Acts 3:19 NIRV-ENG

So turn away from your sins. Turn to God. Then your sins will be wiped away. The time will come when the Lord will make everything new.

What Matters?

The new year is moving right allong, it has not stoped or slown down because I am not ready.  I allways like to see just how long it is before I'm doing those things that I allways do. The same ol same ol. Sometimes change comes and I do embrace the freshness that comes. Kind of like getting a new set of tires on your car. That pink cloud period of goodness dulls to the mundane routine of life. What realy mmatters?
I got a new camera and have been studing how to use its many features. Its incredible how complex just taking a good photograph realy is. My experience has been that all of those features are useless if the purpose for taking the photograph is not right. The expert photographers teach you that you should ask yourself a few questions before taking a picture to try making the composition of your photograph more clear. Why I'm I taking the picture?  What's the story in the picture?
Maybe in the begining of the new year I should take some time in seeing what type of picture of JESUS CHRIST I am painting the people around me.  Matthew 6:33 (NIrV) "Put God's kingdom first. Do what he wants you to do. Then all of those things will also be given to you."  It may not get the picture that I desire but at least if I do what the Bible tells me Jesus will be respected and maybe even those in the very home of Jesus will crack a smile!! And that my friend is what realy matters!!

Thank you Jesus

Here we are in the new year and I needed to start out well. What has been in my mind is just the great testimony that our Lord has given all who sacrifice for Him. I have spent some time with a former boss of mine. We shared a meal at his home and shared our lives with each other. We both gave each other the varification of our relationship with Jesus and what that looks like or should look like. What an amazing brother quiet on his protective roll as an officer but shines that light on all of us that we do not see and even take for granted. What a gift to varify each others character as we walk on that journey that we both have been given. Hidden was a message for the new year. That was  let your light shine that others may see your good works and give Jesus the respect and honor that He is due. I guess that means communication, friendship, and just plain spending more time with others with the intent to enjoy the work that the Lord has all ready done in their lives. Celebration is a great action and attitude. It is one that brings a smile on the face of our maker. HAPPY NEW YEAR

In The Womb- Vol. 3

Thankfulness.

As the Thanksgiving season is approaching, there has been an increase discussion about thankfulness. Obviously, it is easy to be thankful for the good things in our life, but it is often difficult to be thankful for the hard things in life. We may say we are thankful, but are we really?

As we prayed in our last staff meeting, I distinctly remember thanking the Lord for my pregnancy struggles. I have been struggling severely with nausea and other unpleasant side effects of pregnancy. Unable to eat, not able to go number 2, bloated and vomiting, came to a climax last week. I have not been able to enjoy food for the past 3 months. Needless to say, it took a lot of effort and convincing to say that prayer. After my prayer, I remember thinking to myself, "Jen, you are just saying that because you are suppose to." It wasn't until last Friday night that prayer became more of a reality.

Last Friday night at The Able Church, Pastor Tim had called up Molly to share about her Christmas plan for The Able Church to buy an animal for a family in need in a third world country. After Molly sat down, Pastor Tim called me up. It didn't register at first that he was calling on me. But when I realized he wanted me up front, I panicked a bit and thought, "Was I suppose to prepare something?" But then he proceeded to explain to the group how I have been struggling physically with my pregnancy. He wanted everyone as a group to gather around me to pray for me.

The members of The Able Church are very eager to pray for each other's needs and care for them. At least 15 people jumped out of their seats and gathered all round me, pushing their way in to try to touch me and laying hands on my belly. I was overwhelmed by the flood of love and care. (Even as I type this, I am overwhelmed with tears rolling down my face).

No, I was not instantly healed. I actually got nauseous on the way home and still struggling a bit (though things are better than last week!). I may struggle with this all the way through. However, last Friday night standing in that circle, there was a different healing. A peace was given to me that no matter what happens, I have a loving community around me. We will raise our child with so many people loving him/her and praying for him/her. It joyfully overwhelmed me to think about raising our child in the center of the disability community with the love and care he/she will receive. At that moment, a deep sincere feeling of thankfulness filled me. I am thankful for The Able Church, I am thankful for the Camp Daniel community, I'm thankful for my family...and at that moment, I truly experienced thankfulness for my pregnancy struggles so I could experience that love, care and peace that night.

In The Womb - Vol. 2

Parallels

I tend to try to find parallels of the physical things in this world that may teach us about spiritual things. I will think of common everyday things and see if there is a deeper meaning or parallel to something spiritual. For example, the fall and rise of the sun everyday could symbolize the death and resurrection of Christ. Maybe the reason we have to sleep at night is so we can experience His death and resurrection everyday.

Now, I don't know how true those things are and don't attempt to explain God and why He does things. Nor do I try to spiritualize every little thing in life. However, it is fun to think about. We do know in the Bible Jesus spoke in parables and used every day, common things like seeds and gardening to explain the Christian life.

This past week has been a real struggle being pregnant. Being nauseous, unable to eat, unable to go number 2, bloated and vomiting came to its climax. I have not been able to enjoy food for about 3 months. Needless to say, I've been trying to come up with a good reason/parallel for this horrid struggle. Last Monday night, I sat rocking in my favorite chair, with my hands on my belly trying to seek comfort and relief. Moaning, I said to my baby, "Baby, what is it you need?" And a small unheard whisper simply said, "Rest." That I know the baby needed rest. I've been busy with Special Olympics tournaments, church and working extra hours at a clinic. So I said, "Okay, Baby, you got my attention. I will rest."

Immediately, I thought about how many times the Lord finally gets our attention when we are faced with pain and struggles. We do all we can to seek relief before crying out to him and asking, "What is it You want me to do?" And the Lord will simply reply, "Rest." Our physical struggles call us to rest, just as our spiritual struggles and hardships call us to rest. And that was my first parallel.

My second parallel was a little more profound for me. As I was still sitting in my rocking chair with my hands on my belly, Psalm 139 came to mind "You knit me together in my mother's womb." Instantly I was overwhelmed with the sense of the Lord's presence. Just under my hands, the Lord's hands were putting together my baby. Though I know the Lord is always with me and near me, I never felt so close to Him as I did in that moment. It overwhelmed me so much, I shuttered to think of the reality of being so close to him.

Immediately, I thought about Daniel in the Bible. After he was given visions from the Lord, he lay extremely exhausted and weak. It was such an intense spiritual experience, it left him physically ailed. People throughout the Bible feared being in the presence of God, covering their heads, falling to the ground, and even died if they approached/touch God’s presence inappropriately (The Ark of the Covenant, the temple).
So that is my second parallel. With the Lord's hands ever so close to me, forming the baby in my belly, His presence is overwhelmingly too intense. It is such a spiritual experience that it is physically exhausting and ailing.

Again, I'm not going to take a theological stance on these ideas and I understand that no where would scripture support this idea. It may just be my way of coping and making sense of pregnancy pains. I do know God promised women struggles with labor, period. However, I also know that the Lord's hand is on me, forming that little baby. And feeling the Lord's closeness during the struggle makes the entire struggle worth it.